X Factor

I miss "It's a Knockout". Saturday evenings used to be much funnier.

The kids were watching something last night where people had to stand next to a pool and pose into a shape in front of an advancing big shape thing. If they got it wrong they got knocked into a swimming pool. I'm not sure if the pool had a shark in it or not (which would have made it even funnier), however, falling into the pool was obviously what losers did.

I checked back a little later (I was cooking tea) and the 'final' looked like all three contestants in a team (family maybe) had to make a combined shape in front of an even faster advancing big shape thing. The team I watched survived and, presumably, became the winners.

A girl has won X Factor, apparently. I know her name now, but suspect I might struggle next year. I might remember "JLS" because the tune to "3.A.M. Eternal" (I bet they stole the 'L' from 'KLF') goes off in my head every time I see it written. I doubt I'll remember any of their tunes 20 years on. I'll definately not remember that wee fella with the unwritable name and permanent smile. Good luck to the boy though.

It's definately not It's a Knockout though is it?

Surely, bringing that back and binning the Eurovision Song Contest would be much funnier than this X Factor nonsense? We could even let Terry Wogan host the European final, or he could bring out the Joker just before the cat and fish event. I still like Stuart Hall's voice now, listening to him summarise a Saturday afternoon's game at Wigan or Bolton is a real treat.